I am not pathetic because I let a man hurt me. I am pathetic because I thought that he was capable of loving me, that any man was. As a college student who has thousands of things on her plate, all of the time, the last thing I should be thinking about is love. Yet, it is all I can think about, or I guess the lack of it in my life. I do not feel pathetic because a man played me or because I got hurt, I feel pathetic because I am 20 years old and have yet to find love, or feel loved. All of them are the same, ALL OF THEM.
One realized I wasn't easy so he hooked up with a friend of mine that was 2 years older than us. Another one ghosted me after writing me a love letter that he clearly didn’t mean because he started dating someone else a week later. Another one uses me as a therapist because he has relationship issues and cannot see how I feel for him, or how I felt. Another ghosted me after I wouldn’t…you know. And the most recent one is either stupid or disinterested, for my sake, I say he's just stupid. No situationship, failed talking stages, or no matter how many times someone gets ghosted, none of that is more humiliating than living life feeling like you are incapable of feeling loved. Now that's pathetic.